How to Stop Thinking About Your Ex

It is hard to stop thinking about someone you planned your future with, someone you had a strong connection with and someone you were in love. Torturing yourself again and again is pointless, as is feeling sorry for yourself.  How can you realize that even the most dramatic breakup is not the end of the world but a beginning of something new?

Norman Farberou, the American psychotherapist and suicidologist, says that after a crash of a long successful relationship, women hardly ever achieve the same level of mental health.

According to his research, every eighth woman abandoned by a man tried to commit suicide, and more than half of them experienced a deep depression and took antidepressants.

Is my ex thinking about me? Why can’t i stop thinking about my ex?

Ironically, most women do not want to forget men who left them. In fact, they think about them almost 24 hours a day. Such thoughts suck their energy and vitality. However they also bring some pleasure. In fact, when thinking about the ex, you feel closer to him. To some extent, they even enjoy their situations. They forget quarrels and conflicts, and idealized their relationships instead. Deep inside many women hope that he will come back someday.

Here are a few tips from dating web site that should help you recover:

  1. Do not suppress negative emotions – vent them

Well, many women plan to do so. They are visited by their good and supportive friends, so that they can relax and cry. However, after hearing the same thing for 100,000 times while comforting the woman, friends feel exhausted.  Thus, you may hear “Pull yourself together” or “Stop shedding tears” from them. The thing is that they also begin to experience emotional discomfort, especially if they take your story personally. They are overwhelmed with the same amount of negative emotions that the victim tries to get rid of. And it is not surprising, because they are not professional psychotherapists.

How vent emotions regarding ex ones? Cry, do not try to hold tears back. Screaming, beating a pillow, and punching bag in the gym may also help you. But do not imagine you are beating your ex. When there is no one to talk, talk to yourself. Such “conversations” help you see that the event loses its significance gradually.

Got rid of the negative? Fill yourself with the positive: open the window or go out, take some fresh air, listen to birds, etc.

  1. Fill the void

Your partner leaves you, and so are the emotions you used to experience when you two were dating. It often forms a black hole is in the soul. In this case psychologists recommend substitution therapy.

How to stop thinking about your ex? How to fill the void? Do things that will increase serotonin, the hormone of happiness. You need to make your life as diverse and interesting as possible: go on a trip, go in for sports, dance, business, fill it with new people, deeds, events. Free time should remain only for sleep. Try adrenaline sports: skydiving, skateboarding and snowboarding, windsurfing, paintball, etc.

The best way to avenge yourself is to be happy!

  1. Get rid of memories

Do not burn and throw away everything that reminds you of your ex, even though you can t stop thinking about ex. You may regret about getting rid of some of them. It’s better to put them together in a box and take it away so that it does not catch your eye. Afterwards, in a year or two, when the pain is over and your heart is alive, you will have a chance to open it and, perhaps, keep something that will remind of the relationship;

  1. Do not start a new relationship right after the break up

Some women want their ex-lovers to feel jealous, so they start new relationships right after the breakup. However, such relationships usually end up soon enough, as they were triggered by the desire of revenge and not by love.

Therefore, in order not to get confused in your feelings and not to cause yourself even more problems, it is better to wait, suffer, cease to hope and finish the old relationship completely, and then start new ones.

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